The last three days have been quite unique. Wednesday I spent the day praying hard for Haiti, asking for all sorts of miracles.... practically demanding God that he give them hope. In the past bible studies or the radio, I've learned it's okay to wrestle with God; to cry out to Him, to be aggressive in our prayers. To be specific in our prayers. That's just what I did on Wednesday. I have been struggling hard with why I am feeling so sensitive and so compassionate for the Haitians. It's nothing I've ever experienced before... and for me, I feel like there is something more to it than just feeling "bad" for those who are suffering. Why has God laid this on my heart? I want to do something BIG! But, sometimes it's not all about me. Maybe for now, God is just using me to pray diligently and fervently. And I need to be okay with that. I can't help but feel helpless, like I am not contributing at all. But I really am. I never really knew how important prayer was, especially when I am totally surrendered. Like many others who prayed Wednesday, we didn't know that God would answer big. Wednesday night someone had written in to match up to $1,000 given to Haiti for families that are struggling to feed their children. Children who are so malnourished their skin is rotting. I was hopeful that there'd be at good amount and was excited for my chance to donate to make it to $1,000. (for a total of $2,000).
Thursday we were blessed enough to go Christmas shopping by ourselves in Fargo for about 24 hours, including an over-night stay. So when we arrived in our hotel, I could hardly wait to see how much was left to donate. I opened up the website to Haiti Rescue Center, and I see over $9,000 has been donated!! I was totally prepared to donate to them, and I still will, but not at this time. That specific need was met. So far, the last three opportunities to serve and financially donate somewhere, either someone has already fulfilled the need or it never worked out. For me, this means a door has been closed and this is not what God wants us to do at this time. Last year we donated to an Infant Formula Food Program in Nigeria, and I feel this is where God wants us to give again. It is so comforting to know that God is directing us and will literally close doors if it is not the right decision, or better yet, if it is to work out, it will work out perfectly.
This Christmas season, for sure, has been such a blessing to give. I hope you can experience it too!
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