fun pictures from the last few days

Day 4 is approaching in the morning and I am extremely tired from a long couple days. Long=busy days... but went very quickly, which I am thankful for. We went to the fair, Fargo, and back to the fair again. We finally got home at 9:30, kids in bed by 10, groceries put away by 10:15 and snack, editing, and bedtime for me.  I can hardly keep my eyes open.  Goodnight!!

maddy

I guess today's photo of the day was all about Maddy. Goodnight friends

Day1, 2011

And so it begins! I'm on Day one of four. Peter has left for a weekend of fishing, somewhere far away in Canada. I am thankful I have things to do this weekend, otherwise it gets very long. I cried last night before bed and I cried this morning when he left. Two things I am praying for: Safety of course, and that since this group is a bunch of Christian men, that their time would be god-honoring and full of great discussion. I hope that he has lots of fun!

I was up at 5:15 today to watch him go. I did the dishes, folded laundry, made blueberry bread, did a lot of reading, did a workout dvd, and then showered. I felt so good. As I write this, it's nap time and I am about to crash. I guess that's what I get for running off of 5 hours of sleep, but that's okay. It's nice to be tired for once at bedtime instead of wide awake. This week I have been baking quite a lot, mostly for Peter and his trip, but I am 0 for 4 in success. Tuesday I made muffins for our bible study, that were gooey (I used a different flour mixture, not GF mixture, and frozen blueberries... thinking the frozen BB were the culprit), and GF banana bread that was a little overdone. Wednesday I made cookies that became a bit more flat than normal and today my blueberry bread was gooey in the middle, again.  I used half oat flour and half whole-grain flour. So, I am feeling a little timid in the kitchen this week-- I am thankful that I don't really have to cook much this weekend. This morning we had a play & lunch date and tonight we're having leftovers. Tomorrow we are to the fair for lunch, fargo for supper, brunch on Saturday, and fair Saturday night. Sunday I think will be a long day but really most of the weekend is quite busy. I feel slightly guilty just sitting here during nap time to blog, but then I realized that this might be my only chance to truly rest. So, that's pretty much it!

fortunate

 July is going by so quickly. It makes me sad because it soon will be August which means the start of a three-month harvest. Farming really can be both a blessing and a headache. So much of it is relying on trusting that God will truly provide even if 'providing for our needs' is something totally different than what we had in mind :)  Being content with whatever God gives us is definitely something that I'm praying about. We are always hopeful and ALWAYS thankful but never knowing what the year will bring. Knowing all that is happening around the world really puts into perspective how blessed and really fortunate we are.

The photo above is the cake I made this weekend for my sister in laws shower. It is fun making cakes, when they turn out! I am sure I just convince myself it's going to go badly, and then it does. I am working on having a better attitude while making cakes; for instance when I had to make another set of frosting (long story, the next batch was a different color) I kept saying "please Lord, please Lord, please Lord" over and over to help me get through the rest of the frosting. It kept slipping down- the frosting was too soft. That is just not my gift, but hopefully with practice it will get better. (Below is what happened when I chose to spray it with an edible frosting spray. I bawled the night before because it wasn't how I had envisioned it. Silly huh) 

 

Today we are prepping for Peter to leave on his fishing trip (baking, packing, cleaning, etc) and then I'm sure tomorrow will be a sad day for me, for sure. Lately I have felt this cloud of discouragement come over me-- all week. I don't know why exactly but I feel Satan is trying to discourage me somehow. Last night I begged God to give me words of encouragement, and this is what he gave me: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit".  I truly felt Satan attempting to crush my spirit in every way... whether it was my physical appearance, my capabilities of being a mother, wife, etc.. so last night I fell asleep repeating those versus. What a great god.

prayers

I had started a post about this past weekend and how fun and busy it was.... with pictures and lots of fun things. But, right now I just feel down. I feel like I let God down. Haiti has always been heavy on my heart, and t hey are so overwhelmed right now at the rescue center. I felt like God was telling me to fast today, and I convinced myself last night that I would do so. Today I woke up in a bad mood, probably not enough sleep, and I decided that I wasn't going to fast, but I would still try to pray. If you've never fasted before, really the point of fasting is that whenever you feel hunger pains, you are then prompted to pray for a specific thing. So, I told God that I would still like Him to prompt me to pray. And He did. I was hungry most of the day, but I had no words to pray. I had no idea what to pray for. I prayed, for sure, but then I would get distracted and I had no idea what I was to pray for. I know the Holy Spirit intercedes for us, but I still felt helpless.. like I wasn't helping at all. I had visited a friend today in Grand Forks and so my mind was occupied with her and the baby, then groceries, and then rushing to get home by 5. I tried really hard to pray, but my mind was blank. I just kept saying the same things over and over. 

So tonight I logged onto facebook and saw some updates on some of the kids at the rescue center. There are 5 critical kids ,-- many new kids that are very ill and malnourished. Thalie is not doing well today. Here is an update I just saw about 20 minutes ago: 

Thalie is bleeding out quite a bit- trying to ease her pain and seizures as best as we can. Her mom is here visiting. Watching a mother realize her kid most likely won't make it is probably my least favorite thing ever...

So, I guess I am sad. I wish I had known what to pray for, what specific things. I wish so, so, badly, that I could be used. That my prayers can be heard. That my prayers really do matter. That these poor, innocent kids would not suffer. I struggled with this last week a little bit and God encouraged me with two songs: My Savior My God,  & There Will Be a Day . Two very popular, well-known songs, and I've heard them a million times before, but they gave comfort to me that day. The first song really spoke to me with the very first sentence:  I am not skilled to understand {what God has willed what God has planned}.  My Savior Lives My Savior Loves... He loves us.. no matter what. And I have to trust that, even with all the pain I am seeing. I think it is easy for us to change the 'channel' of life to a happier channel. Moving our head in a direction that is easier to look at.  I choose to look at what is happening around the world, asking God to open my eyes, to use me in prayer, financial support, etc. I hope you will consider doing so too.  These poor kids need our prayers!

shelf is up!

After swimming lessons on Tuesday, we decided we should go to Grand Forks for a few needed items. One stop, of course, was Amazing Grains (healthfood store) -- I began looking up some recipes for bread on Peter's Iphone and didn't really find much. We also decided that we need to come up with a good flour mix so that we didn't have to spend a ton of money buying premade mixes since that can get expensive. I think the more types of flours you h ave, the better. So I bought a few more types of flour to add to my selection and voila! A bread mixture, in my mind, that is pretty good! I thought, honestly, that the bread tasted like a wheat bread, except the texture was still a little different, but really, that is not going to change in a non-gluten bread.  I served some with lunch and he asked for more, so I suppose that is a good sign.  I didn't copy an actual recipe, but followed two or three and added what flours and amounts I thought would make a good bread.Anyway, here's what we've been up to since Saturday:

We did end up getting our shelf up.  It needs a little work but I am happy with it. Today will be nice because we don't have a lot planned and we can really just enjoy our time, whatever we end up doing. Swimming lessons have been so much fun and hopefully today we can stay to swim a bit longer than we have been. Maddy doesn't love it, but at least she is in the water! More later.

frazzled

I woke up yesterday in shock that it was 8:40. I dashed out my door to see if Kate had been waiting for me in the living room... instead I found Emily, reading an Ikea magazine. At first I didn't see her; when she said hello, I jumped! Even though it felt so good to sleep in, it was unintentional and I felt totally frazzled, about 2 hours off schedule. By then I think I would have started my workout, got my reading done, and probably unloaded the dish washer. Maybe even some clothes done. Oh well. I told this to Peter yesterday and he said he heard a program on KFNW (Christian radio) about how Americans never 'rest' or sleep in. They are so consumed in their work, even on the Sabbath Day, that they never truly rest. I guess I need to be more laid back and not worry so much about what needs to get done. So this week I am going to try to work on that.

During naptime we also weeded the garden together (they took half a day off) -- when you're in love I guess you relish in any and every opportunity to be together alone... even if it IS weeding the garden in 90 degree heat.  I enjoyed it.  The rest of the day was spent at swimming lessons. Maddy's latest thing is crying uncontrollably about nothing. She's always been a crier, though I know no one believes me, - she puts on this sweet, innocent, quiet, act in front of everyone when really she is loud, and really, completely opposite. So, I sat with her for 5-10 minutes on the edge of the pool until she finally quit crying, completely unsure if she'd even be able to have swimming lessons. I let the teachers take her and I slipped away to watch kate. I saw her looking for me which was so sweet... I know she loves me, just sometimes a little too much!  If I seem like I'm complaining, I'm really not. I'm just explaining her personality. On the contrary, she loves to cuddle, gives tons of hugs and kisses, and is my snuggle bug. Who know that would come out of her personality! Though they are sisters, they have proven to be completely opposite; true even with potty training. She is well on her way to be fully potty trained, with nights and naps being dry too!  I just love it. I am praising God that He gave me hope and answered my prayers for easy potty training, and that is just what I got!  I think that's all for now; we have a play date this morning, lessons in the afternoon, and family time tonight. My hope is that we can get the shelving up from Ikea that I bought two weeks ago. I am so excited!

excited

{I} have very little time to write, but thought i'd give an update on what we're up to.  Today I was told by Peter that I was a heathen.  Not true, even though I did skip church! The kids slept in finally after 10 and 11:00 bedtimes this weekend, + zero naps.  I don't regret it.. It's been nice to be at home for once. This afternoon I edited photos most of nap time, which is my kind of relaxing! I love looking through all the pictures that were taken... it makes me smile (and sometimes frown when they aren't in focus) but it is such a reminder of how much fun I have taking photos. 

Later today after nap, we went to Florian with some friends. It seemed like the perfect weather... not too hot, nor too cold. By 6:30 it was nice and calm, and warm... perfect. We didn't get home until after 9 and the girls, again, got a late bedtime (and me too.... I can't sleep :(  )   This week seems like there's going to be lots to do... we are preparing for a bridal shower that really snuck up on us! a birthday party, swimming lessons, and hot weather. The garden really needs to be weeded, grass mowed, and on Friday I have to somehow decorate a cake. I know it's a silly thing to pray for, but I am praying that I am not too picky and that God would give me wisdom on how to make the cake! Somewhere in there we have to decorate the home the b.shower is going to be hosted in. I am hoping it is not too chaotic.  Well, I really should get to bed... but at least I got a lot done on here.  More later

sleep

its 12am and I have too much on my mind. Mostly all the things I have to do tomorrow. I never really did pack, for anyone, and i never made my caramel corn because it was too late. But now that I am STILL up at 12am, I am regretting not getting it done. Unfortunately that will be first on my list tomorrow.  I think, okay, one night, one days worth of clothes to pack, yet I still have to pack: packandplay, potty chair, fans, cd player for kate (she's been scared lately) food in cooler, last minute things like toothbrushes, hairdryers, etc.  Even if it's just one night, we still have to pack a lot of the things we'd use on a 3 day trip. We aren't leaving until after lunch, but I want to be able to play with the kids, not just do things that I need to get done. That makes me sad.

Since It's 12, I guess that means it's our anniversary! (frozen wedding cake a year after we were married) Honestly, Peter reminded me earlier today that it was our anniversary tomorrow. I said, "oh yeah..!"  - We celebrated on Sunday so I was a bit fogged. We usually have a meal we make at our home so I am kind of sad we can't do that this year but we had so much fun in the cities it doesn't even matter. I haven't been reading in the morning, either. The last two days I read at night, and I attempted to read Wednesday morning but failed due to lack of concentration. I think it is fun to look back to see that sometimes God might cause a lack of concentration so that you might get more out of scripture from the day you've had. Today I felt like God gave me this verse and it was perfect that I read it tonight, after a small occurrence today. (PS if you are reading this it probably has nothing to do with you! just a rare conversation)

Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, watching over them—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not pursuing dishonest gain, but eager to serve; ³ not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.

1 Peter 5:2-3

Mostly verse three I guess. An incident happened today where I felt a little attacked, and instead of saying mean things back, I chose not to say anything really.  not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.   But being examples to the flock.  I think that is self explanatory.  If i would have read that this morning, before the incident, I wouldn't have gotten anything out of it. But tonight, I did.  And now tonight I can't sleep. Maybe this verse, too, is speaking to you? So i felt like I should blog it. And I did.  Now hopefully I fall asleep soon!

wow!

so far today i've made the rub for my pulled pork, cut the stems off my strawberries, I still have to actually make jam and cook the pork, and make the bbq sauce, and make the caramel corn, and I want to exercise, i haven't read yet, yikes! It's only 8am. I am still finishing up laundry from the previous week and I am not quite used to the schedule now.. it is hard to come back to having a set schedule when for the last 5 days I've just gotten to do whatever I wanted to do (basically) -- I could get up and exercise, didn't have to worry about housework, we got to go where ever we wanted, didn't have to cook.. etc. It was a challenging day for me yesterday, which is sad, but I know it will get back to normal next week. All this constant moving is really wearing me out.  I just wanted to write a little -- but now I have to get back to work before the girls wake up.  It has been refreshing that they slept in a bit...kate came in the room about 6:15 and rolled around for quite a while so I am thankful that she slept in. Praying for strength in areas like parenting where I can be gentle and loving when the kids are trying. I cannot rely on my own strength, that's for sure.

quick

We are back from Minneapolis, and after talking with Peter, we both agree that the 5 days we were there (1 basically spent traveling) it seemed like 2! I remember being sad after Saturday because the trip was going so fast! We missed our girls more than usual, but we also really relished in the opportunity to just spend some alone time together. It is a really good time for us to go because it seems like May and June are always so busy on the farm, with all the planting and spraying he has to do. We are back for 2 days and then we go again for a Hvidsten reunion. I think that will be fun. PS, the above photo I thought was funny. Also, I had started the post below but never finished, so I just published that today, written on Friday morning.

 Line at Izzys.

 Meeting with Deb who does work at the rescue center I follow.

 Anniversary Meal.

 Our bikes!

We did some really fun things in the city this time, -- we spent more time with friends which was really relaxing, and did a lot of walking around downtown, which is where we stayed. We went for a long bike ride, and tried some interesting restaurants. We spent 2 hours in Ikea! Peter did not care for that I don't think; he spent a lot of time sitting, which he was then happy about. I suppose he's not used to all that walking. I got my frames that I have been waiting for, and picking up a list of things for a friend. On the way into town we stopped at an Antique mall and I found an almost perfect serving piece for my living room! I envisioned a black piece of furniture with one chair on each side of it. A little spot to enjoy some tea or coffee or just a good book. I also picked up a black chandelier from Ikea that I plan to hang above the area. I got the two chairs at a TJ Maxx. I was so thankful Peter was willing to just trust my ideas on decorating and when we set it up last night he agreed it looked really good. Today my goal is to unpack and tomorrow I am sure i will be cooking and baking for the reunion. It would be nice to get the shelving up too.I picked up some frames so that I could put the kids' art -- I am really excited to decorate some of the upstairs with the ikea stuff I bought. I'ts been 6 years and hardly anything is done up there. Also I plan to have lots of fun with my girls!!

excited

 I have started a huge list and have only a few things left on it to do this
week; I'm sure i'll add to it once I finish what's left. A while ago my camera was left in the rain so this week I'm sending off my lens to be repaired. I'm soo happy I got insurance on my camera and my lens. It's really worth it. I think the lens itself just needs to be cleaned but at least I don't have to pay for it.

Yesterday ended up being really fun. I tried to enjoy the kids a little more than normal. Kate & I went on our bikes up and down half of our block (on the sidewalk) - usually she is really scared because it is uneven pavement, but tonight she wasn't. Maddy followed behind on her little trike, not quite reaching the pedals. She moved out of our way when we passed her. The kids and peter, yes, peter, had popcorn for a snack. He was over enjoying that popcorn... he even had half a can of pop, which I also shared (it's been a long time for that, too, for me) He can basically have everything except gluten and dairy. He says he's going to cheat this weekend.

I am left with bittersweet feelings as I finish up packing and cleaning the house before we leave. I want to go for a walk with the girls or do something fun with them... it seems like Satan always tries to leave me with horrible thoughts of what might happen to us or the kids while I am gone. I am fighting those thoughts right now and ask for prayer! I want to be able to enjoy the weekend, not living in fear or worry about the kids' safety (or ours). Well I better get busy. Talk later, after our trip!