Monday, January 18, 2010

Monday Funday?

Today is Monday the 18th. Over the last two or so months, I have been struggling with breastfeeding. It started in November when I had gone away for about 4-5 hours, and came back to pump. In that amount of time, I only pumped out 2 1/2 ounces!!! This child was living off of probably 3-4 oz, every two hours. It is only partially my fault though. At about 4 months old she was nice and plump. Then she began to only want to drink for 5 min. on each side... which altered how much milk i was producing. Kate would always make so much noise, maddy would get distracted. Anyway, so last night i was pretty darn sure i had to quit. The first two times my milk supply started to get really low, i cried and cried and cried. I was determined to get it back. I took herbal supplements and it did work, a little. It probably boosted my supply up to an ounce greater. But it has dropped again, and last night i was pretty sure (and kinda ok) with being done. I realized that it's not even the 'bond' i have with her when i nurse, (because i pretty much only pump) and i'm ok if she doesnt get that bottle of breast milk a day.... the thing that is hitting me the most is that, when my milk supply is completely gone..... so is her babyhood. I'm taking supplements again, for the third time in 2 months, and i'm drinking more water, and I am also trying to pump every 3 hours for sure, and we'll see what happens in about 4-5 days. My goal for sure is 10 months.... and i've got two, long hard weeks ahead.

On a lighter note i've been taking more pictures again. So, here they are:


  1. You have done so well. Think of all the challenges in the beginning of Maddy's life and you gave it your all! I think you have so much to be proud of as a mom. You love your girls so much and do everything you can for them. Don't be hard on yourself or be sad because of her growing up. It really is one of the ultimate goals of motherhood although it is so bittersweet.

  2. I never knew how hard it would be to breastfeed, and even harder to give it up. *tear*