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Sunday, April 15, 2012

a plan

Right now I am eating a graham cracker with all natural chunky peanut butter. I am also drinking some red raspberry tea. I've been so thirsty lately and tea seemed to be good. Our water has been tasting funny lately because when we moved the fridge, the settings reset for the hard water/ soft water. I had peter switch it and it helped a little but not to my liking. That is probably why I feel dehydrated. I hate our water.

It is funny to me the range of emotions I've gone through this past week. Happy, sad, extremely sad, motivated, desperate, really good mood, and now I am ... not so much at peace, but I think getting there. I just finally realized that I am trying to have this baby on my own. I keep thinking, ok, more walking, more 'doing', more chiro appointments, more this and that.  I read an email from a friend who recently had a baby and she gave such wisdom that really struck me. She told me I should try to be relaxed as possible. She said she was at peace the night before, she read scripture, she was OKAY with being induced and to me it seemed like she just surrendered her situation to God. I have been stubborn about situations like this (remember potty training!!) I thought Kate should be potty trained and I was doing everything I could, yet I didn't fully submit to God and just let Him do the work.  So, I am going to try my best to just relax. I'm definitely going to go to my appointments but I know the baby will come when it's ready. And of course I am going to completely keep praying because I know how faithful God can be, and if I was meant to be induced..... well, then i will. Praying for wisdom on that too.  A huge monkey wrench in this, is that my doctor will be gone May 3-13.... so if i went past my due date, i'd have to be induced at the latest May 1st. So then I think, if I am going to be induced anyway, why not end the misery and do it the 26th.  I need wisdom for this and praying that I can just go naturally and not have to choose a date!

Here are some photos of Maddy's birthday party just one week ago. This week sure flew by and I know this week will too, with all the appointments and events going on this week.



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